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WATCH OUT FOR THAT-- oh man, sorry about that particle beam, Anatoli.

Posted on February 25, 2011 at 1:49 AM

Anatoli Bugorski-- proving that Russians are so effing hardcore that they will facebutt a particle beam.


This is just one of those wierd true things that you want to know about... trust me!


In 1978, soviet scientist Anatoli Bugorski was eating a taco bell beefy five-layer burrito, when a dollop of seasoned ground beef-like material and sour cream, dripped into the particle accelerator.  Thinking quickly, Anatoli stuck his head into the accelerator, (no, not really, he was checking some kind of failed mechanism).  What followed was later described by Anatoli as a 'flash brighter than a thousand suns' as the proton beam, traveling close to the speed of light, pierced through his face and out the back of his head.


Amazingly, he reported that he felt no pain.  He was taken to a clinic in Moscow so that doctors could observe his expected demise.  After absorbing (reportedly) several hundred times the amount of radiation it would take to kill a person, they expected the end to come quickly.  However, no one remembered to tell Anatoli to die, so instead of keeling over he got up and had a sandwich. He's still living.  And except for some seizures and a partial paralysis of his face, he still enjoys physics and taco bell.


This is all true, you can wiki it.  It may be hard to visualize how someone could stick their head in a particle accelerator, but it was Soviet Russia.  It was probably made out of refridgerator magnets and duct tape and powered by a monkey on a bicycle, so safety restrictors?  Forget about it, Vladimir.  


On an interesting sidenote, another effect of the accident was a bizarre change to his appearance.  When one looks directly at Mr. Bugorski, the right side of his face has the normal, wrinkled appearance of an elderly man, while the left side of his face is apparently 'frozen in time' and hasn't aged a day since the accident. 


Now I'm an evil scientist, so your line of thought might not travel the same direction as mine, but to me this poses several interesting scenarios.  First, we might finally be able to rid the world of Zombie Joan Rivers (we might be able to convince her to stick her face in a particle accelerator.  I mean so far, the survival rate is 100%, (we're one for one)) Second, what if we did convince Zombie Joan Rivers to stick her head in there, and instead of her head exploding, dying of radiation poisoning, or just gaining the ability to keep a youthful appearance without surgery-- what if she gained super powers?  What if she became a flying Joan Rivers with eyes that shot lazers?  Third, do you think the other scientists ever refered to him as Two-face?  "Holy Sputnik, someone call Batman, Two-face has escaped Arkham Asylum again and-- ohhhhh, snap, sorry Anatoli."


At any rate, it's another interesting tidbit that you can bring out at random times to impress less informed people.

Categories: Secrets of Scientists, Awwww, come on!, From the Random Character Files...

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1 Comment

12:12 AM on March 3, 2011 
I would like to see a picture of "two-face" front on. This is definatly the type of useless information that I love to have handy, Thanks Kris.